October 22, 2005

What's a girl to do...

When you're a sophomore in college the one question plaguing you, or me, is "What do you want to do for the rest of your life?"  Well, right now, I cannot answer that, and it scares me.  After already investing nearly $100,000 at NYU I feel as though I am going nowhere.  I thought I wanted to do international relations...and I thought I wanted to be a journalist, but now I dont know.  But what I do know is that I enjoy French and that's about all the certainty I have right now.   I've come across a lot of people at NYU who have passion...passion for music, passion for acting, for singing, for film...you name it...it's there.  But I thought a lot about myself and my passion, and I really couldn't think of one thing that really captivates me.  Where does that leave me in the spectrum of, well, life.  People are supposed to know exactly what they want at 18 when they apply to college.   But why?  How does one know exactly what they want to do for the rest of their lives when they're only 18...they cant even buy alcohol legally....if you cant be trusted with alcohol at that age, how can you be trusted with a career choice?  It's ludicrous.  I know i'm not the only one persay that feels like this, who feels lost, but there's so much pressure to start your career NOW. 

Honestly right now, I'm 19 years old, I want to have fun with my friends before I have to dive headfirst into I-dont-know-what yet.  Life always throws curveballs your way and hopefully one will come in my direction.  I need a sign, or something, to help me decide what I want to do.  I truely believe dumb-luck plays a part in success.  Sometimnes people hit the jackpot because they were in the right place at the right time.  For example, although it may be a bad one, I was watching "When Supermodels Ruled the World" on VH1 and most of these women were scouted when they were boarding a plane or in a McDonalds eating a BigMac, and they became the biggest supermodels to to walk the runway. They reached superstardom on a fluke, on complete and utter DUMB-ASS LUCK! If only I could be so lucky, however, life is not that easy.  Maybe my hard work will pay off, and one of these days I will find something that interests me....but until them....I'm just chillen.

-X  
Posted by xtina at 03:12:53 | Permanent Link | Comments (8) |
Comments
1 - im sry ur so lost. i wish u new wut u wanted to do.

i myself dont no wut i want to do. i want to be a judge, i want to be a dancer, a singer, a gymnast... i dunno.
i really dont.

 (Comment this)

Written by: June at 2005/10/22 - 02:27:12
2 - You're only 19...give yourself a break! Your only objective at this point in your life should be to learn as much as possible. Expose yourself to everything you possibly can...learn constantly and question everything. You need to prepare yourself mentally for when you do get out into the 'real world' to be able to stand alone - for an idea, a value, a business initiative. Stop watching that crap on MTV and read some good books - Only the Paranoid Survive, Good to Great, Fish! (Comment this)

Written by: Anonymous at 2005/10/22 - 02:27:28
3 - anonymous, you are dumb. nobody asked for your advice. obviously, christina is not an idiot because she goes to one of the most prestigious schools in the country. and you are wrong; one should be questioning what he/she intends to do once school gets out. spending 40 grand a year to "learn as much as possible" without direction or focus, is foolish and naive. and nobody understands the last part of your comment (Only the Paranoid Survive....). I really hope that is not a recommendation for a novel. if so, then i suggest that YOU go and read some uplifting literature. for instance, paul coelho's "the alchemist," or mikhail bulgakov, "the master and margarita." and also, whoever you are, i suggest you stop wasting your time reading some 19-yr old girl's blogs and staring into your computer screen/posting inane haphazard anonymous comments, and actually go out and do something productive. go running, or get laid. it seems like you really need it. (Comment this)

Written by: jaime at 2005/10/22 - 02:52:29
4 - um actually, anonymous, you are right. (Comment this)

Written by: Anonymous at 2005/10/27 - 04:05:20
5 - UM OKAY, YOU ARE NOT RIGHT. CHRISTINA HATES YOUR GUTS, ANONYMOUS. THAT IS WHY I RESPONDED TO YOUR POST. AND THE LEAST U COULD DO IS POST YOUR NAME U SHITHEAD. FAGFAG. (Comment this)

Written by: jaime at 2005/10/28 - 00:07:52
6 - haha (Comment this)

Written by: Anonymous at 2005/10/28 - 15:13:58
7 - Hey Christina, long time no see. I hope everything is going well. Whatever you choose to do, you will do fine after college. While I don't think you should necessarily take such an expensive college experience as a joy-ride, you shouldn't feel pressured to do anything and get fixed in now. I read somewhere (though it was probably a lie) that the average person changes careers 4 times in their life... which sounds like bullshit, but it goes to show you that you don't need to decide now. Where you are today is not necessarily where you're going to be tomorrow; but that doesn't mean you shouldn't follow your feelings today.

I'm not so sure about the flaming going on here, but, either way, good luck, have an awesome year. (Comment this)

Written by: dave at 2005/11/07 - 03:22:42
8 - drink a lot of beer (Comment this)

Written by: spuds at 2005/11/22 - 05:22:16
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